Topham Times

Topham Times

Monday, March 28, 2016

My daughters encounter the 2016 presidential election, part 5

Remember how Leila's goal has been to become the first female president of the U.S.? She came home from school yesterday and announced that she was 100% certain that Hillary Clinton was going to win the November election. Therefore, she would need to find a new goal. To that end, Leila asked me if I could turn her into a "Black girl." She said that if she couldn't be the first "girl president," then she wanted to be the first African American woman to be president. (Ah Shirley Chisholm, where are you now?)

My dear daughter, if you get an owie on your knee and need someone to kiss it better, daddy can do that. If you need someone to teach you what a gerund is, daddy can do that. But if you need someone to transform you into an African American kid, that is one thing daddy cannot do.

A little fatherly advice, if I may: It would be more realistic for you to try to become the first female president with Mexican heritage. Yeah, I know it's a stretch, since we are talking about your second great grandfather, who migrated north into Texas from Mexico in 1903. But "Leila Topham, part of the Reconquista since 1903" would look great on a campaign button.

Now, dear child, set aside your political ambitions for the moment and keep practicing the solo you will be singing in your school's talent show in just over a week. One thing at a time, kiddo, one thing at a time.

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